Eurotrip Atlantis style
by BeckettLover
Summary: Parody of the funny movie Eurotrip. John is dumped by Teyla and decides to go on a trip, to Europe with his best friend, to tell Elizabeth, his pen pal, that he loves her.
1. Graduation Day

A/N: I got the idea for this story while watching the movie for the 20th time. I was watching it and one of the bunnies stopped, and told me it would be cool to do a parody of the movie as a fanfic. For those who have seen the movie, the characters are as follows:

Scott John Cooper Carson Jamie Rodney Jenny Jeanie (McKay and Mrs. Miller)

Mika Elizabeth Fiona Teyla Donny Ronon Creepy Italian Radek

Other characters will show up too, but since they aren't the main ones, I don't feel obligated to list them all, as there is too many.

Hope you enjoy, if not, whatever, I'll enjoy it.

It was graduation day. John, Carson, Rodney, and Jeanie had made it through 4 years of grueling work, evil teachers, and hard relationships. The four of them were going to go to a party tonight before they split for the summer.

John and Carson were standing, waiting for their parents when John spotted his girlfriend Teyla.

"There she is. Teyla!"

"Hey," Teyla said when she got to him.

"Hey," John replied.

"Congratulations graduate," Teyla said, kissing John.

"Thanks, baby," John returned the kiss.

"And congratulation to you to, Carson"

"Awe. Thanks, baby" Carson said, leaning in for a kiss as well.

Teyla smacked him on his arm. "Nice try."

Carson pulled John aside to ask him something really quickly.

"So I'll see you at Wade's party tonight right?" he asked.

"Yea, I'll see you there," John said before walking back to Teyla.

He put his hands on her waist and gave her another kiss.

"So next year you graduate, and join me in college. It will be just like we planned."

"John, we need to talk," Teyla told him.

"Yea? What about?" John said, worriedly. She had just said the deadly four words.

"About me dumping you," she replied, without any emotion whatsoever.

"Huh? Dumping me?" John stared at her.

"There he is!" His parent's voice rang through the air.

"The graduate and his beautiful girl friend, smile you two," John's father said.

Teyla separated herself from him, so that she could pose for the camera, as John's father continued to take numerous pictures of the couple, while his mother video taped the whole event.

"Dad, Mom, Grandma... Uncle Moke... I need a minute here ok?" John said to them before taking Teyla's arm and pulling her away so that they could continue their talk.

"What do you mean you're dumping me?" John was completely surprised. He had thought that the two of them had been perfect for each other.

"I just can't take all the lying and cheating on each other anymore," Teyla told him, still emotionless.

"What are you talking about? Sweetie, I never cheated on you," John said, completely taken aback by the fact that Teyla thought he would cheat on her.

"I know. That's what makes this so hard," Teyla replied.

Now John was even more confused. If she knows that he would never cheat on her, then why would she break up with him?

His parents, meanwhile, were still taking pictures of the two of them. "You're looking good guys."

"John, it's not you. It's me," Teyla admitted, "There I go, lying again. It was you. You're just so, so... predictable"

"So that's it?" John still couldn't believe that this was happening to him. He had seriously thought that the two of them were going to make it.

"Here's your letter jacket back. Goodbye." Teyla handed John the jacket.

The moment the jacket left her hand, she ran off to meet up with the guy that she had been cheating on John with, Ronon.

As she ran away, John's father walked up to him. "She's a keeper," he said, without realizing what had just happened.

"Teyla!!!!!" John yelled after her, his eyes full of tears, heartbroken. Unknown to him, his mother had continued to film and had caught it all on tape.

Later that day...

Carson and John's brother were in John's room, replaying him yelling Teyla's name over and over on John's T.V.

"Let's see that again" Carson told John's brother.

"This is just so brutal" John's brother said laughingly.

"And yet, I can't look away. Play it again" Carson said, with tears in his eyes from laughing so hard.

John had had enough.

"Get out of here" he told his brother.

"Stay black, man" Carson told John's brother on his way out, knocking knuckles together.

That's when John's computer came to life. "Mail mother" was heard as a picture of a letter appeared on the screen.

"Hey I got an email from Weir." John said to Carson. He had been talking to Weir for a year now as a way to help him with his German.

"Happy Herzlichen" the mail read.

"Still writing that guy? I thought that was for German class," Carson asked John.

"Yeah, at first, but we're actually becoming good friends," John told Carson, as he began to type his response.

"Dear Weir, greetings from your American pen pal" the response started out. Carson had heard it all since John had been saying out loud what he was writing, and had to say something.

"John, girl scouts have pen pals," he started, "Listen to yourself, alright? You met a "cool guy" on the "internet." This is how sexual predators work. Next thing you know, he'll want to "arrange a meeting" where he'll gas you and stuff you in the back of his van. Come on, let's go to Wade's," Carson told John, and started to walk towards the door.

"All right. Fine. Screw it, let's go. I'm not going to let Teyla ruin my graduation night," John said with conviction.

He sent the email and closed his computer. He then walked to the door, where Carson was waiting for him, and left his room.

They took John's Mustang and drove to where the party was being hosted. John parked a couple of blocks away to keep his car safer from theft and vandalism.

They walked to the party, with John determined to have a good time with Carson, Rodney, and Jeanie.

A/N: I was going to write this in the Pegasus Galaxy and have John take a puddle jumper and then have them gate to other planets to get to the one he needs, but then it wouldn't make sense that he was going to visit Elizabeth, so I decided to stick them on Earth.

I have tried to stick to the movie as close as possible. I hope I can do it justice.


	2. The Party

A/N: Here's the second part of the setup of why they go to Europe at all. It contains the song that I was told I had forgotten to put in chapter 1. I hadn't forgotten it; I had been planning on putting it here, after changing the lyrics to fit with the parody. The words in italics are the song so as to not confuse anyone. Enjoy!

THE PARTY

When John and Carson got to the party, they headed towards the kegs that were there. As they were pouring themselves drinks, the Jeanie walked up to them.

"Hey losers," she said playfully.

"Hey Jeanie," John replied before taking a swig of the drink he had gotten himself.

"Hey, dude," Carson replied.

"Sorry to hear about Teyla. She's a whore," Jeanie told John in hopes of making him feel better.

"That's very sweet of you. Thanks," John smiled and started to walk away from the kegs, with Carson and Jeanie following him.

"Enough Teyla talk," Carson stated, "Look around. There's gotta be 100 drunk girls. We should try to have sex with every one of them" he finished with a gleam in his eye.

This made John laugh. He stopped, turned, and patted his friend on the back as a thank you.

"Hello? Mixed company?" Jeanie stated. She was sick of hearing Carson talk about having sex with girls all the time.

"What?" Carson asked, totally oblivious to what was wrong with Jeanie.

"I'm a girl," she told him for the thousandth time since they had become friends.

"No, you're not. You're just a cool guy with long hair" Carson replied jokingly.

Wanting to stop the bickering he had heard before, John stepped in and asked:

"So where's your evil twin brother?" He was joking of course.

Just as Jeanie was about to reply, a voice was heard from somewhere ahead of them.

"Jeanie!!!" They all turned to see Jeanie's twin, Rodney, come walking out from a crowd with two drinks in his hands.

"There he is" Jeanie told John and Carson and walked over to meet Rodney.

"Hey, Rodney, in fine form I see" Carson told him. He was once again making fun of poor Rodney. Rodney had managed to get alcohol all over himself while trying to get drinks.

Rodney handed Jeanie her drink and then took a sip of his own.

Jeanie took a drink from her cup, and immediately spit it out.

"Why'd you get me gin and tonic? I hate gin" she told her brother angrily.

Rodney looked at her surprised, "You do?" He had thought he had gotten her something she would like.

By now, John and Carson were laughing at the two of them.

"You guys are the worst twins ever," Carson told them, while trying to hold back his laughter.

All the while, the other people at the party were having chugging contests, skinny dipping in the pool, and blasting loud music over the speakers. The football players had managed to get wasted and some of them had passed out already.

Ignoring the party around them, our group of friends started to walk around while continuing to talk about their plans for the summer.

"When are you guys taking off?" John asked the twins. They were going to spend the summer backpacking through Europe.

"Tomorrow morning," came the reply from Jeanie.

It was at that moment, that the group passed a guy tied to a tree. He had a rag in his mouth and rope, tying him to the tree, from head to toe.

"Hey Wade, great party man," Carson told him as the group continued walking. None of them even attempting to help the poor guy out.

"Man, I am so excited," Rodney said, continuing their talk about the twin's trip.

"A whole summer backpacking through Europe" came Jeanie's response, "You should've come with us instead of working for Dr. Dad, John," she finished.

The twins had told their friends about this trip long before they had graduated. They had asked John to come with them, but he had refused, saying that he was going to go work for his dad in the hospital.

Rodney, being the geek that he is, pulled a book out of his pocket.

"Yeah. I planned every detail of the trip to maximize the fun," he said, totally excited that he was going to get to go.

"You brought a book to a party?" Carson laughed at his friend once again.

"Yeah. Do you guys want to see my itinerary?" he really wanted to show John and Carson all the sites he had planned to visit.

Of course, Carson, being a jerk as usual, replied "You want to see my balls?"

John, hoping to make Rodney feel better after Carson's comment, continued to ask questions about the trip.

"Have you guys decided where you are going to go first?" he asked.

Jeanie jumped in, preventing Rodney from answering, "Paris! I can't wait," she was practically jumping up and down as she explained where they were going to go, "Two years ago, Nicky Jagger's sister, Debbie met a wealthy French guy, and spent a month sailing the Mediterranean on his yacht."

Before anyone could get a word in, she continued, "Isn't that the most romantic thing you've ever heard?"

"Stuck on a boat with some weird French guy? Sounds a little gay to me," Carson, still thinking of Jeanie as a guy, replied.

"It's not gay. I'm a girl" she said yet again.

"Kinda gay" Carson said, "A little gay," John agreed before taking another swig of his drink.

"I gotta go pee" Carson announced and walked off from the group.

The others just looked at him and shook their heads. Jeanie and Rodney said goodbye to John, explaining that they still had some packing to do, and that they would see him once they got back.

John was alone for the moment. He took another drink, and decided to listen to the music. It stopped abruptly as Ronon grabbed the mike.

"Hey, listen up everybody" he started, "Gotta little special thing I'd like to do tonight. Going to play a little song for you about the nastiest, freakiest little sex puppet I know... Teyla,"

At this, John dropped his drink and stared at the stage as Teyla came running out of nowhere and into Ronon's arms.

"This one's for you baby. Happy anniversary," Ronon said before devouring Teyla's mouth in a kiss. When they broke apart, he grabbed the mike and started singing his song.

_Johnny doesn't know_

_That Teyla and me_

_Do it in my van every Sunday!_

_She tells him she's in church_

_But she doesn't go_

_Still she's on her knees and..._

_Johnny doesn't know_

_Oh, Johnny doesn't know _

_So don't tell Johnny cause_

_Johnny doesn't know_

_Johnny doesn't know_

CUT SCENE: Carson's bathroom detour...

Carson had been trying to find a place to go pee, but stopped when he heard voices on the other side of a hedge.

"I hope we're just as popular in college as we were in high school" the voice of a girl rang out.

"We will. I know it" answered another girl.

Intrigued by what he was hearing, Carson walked over to the hedge and pushed it apart. On the other side, he saw two nude girls leaving a hot tub, and a third still in.

As the two on the outside left to get drinks, Carson decided that this was his best chance of getting laid tonight. He walked through the hedge and jumped into the spa.

"Oops, this isn't where I parked my car" he said looking around, hoping that the blonde would buy his story.

CUT SCENE: Song continuation...

_I can't believe _

_He's so trusting_

_While I'm right behind you thrusting_

_Cause Johnny doesn't know_

_Johnny doesn't know..._

CUT SCENE: Back to Carson in the tub...

The blonde did not buy Carson's story at all. Covering her boobs with her arms, she started to leave, telling him, "Carson Beckett, you're a pig!"

"Uhhh... Laura, you should clean that off before you go," Carson said quickly, hoping that he could dupe her into staying longer. It worked.

"Clean what off?" Laura was confused. She had just been in water, what could she possibly have on her that needs to be cleaned off?

"You have a little something on you" came Carson's answer.

"Where?"

"Right there" Carson told her. He had pointed to a place on his own chest to prevent her from freaking out should he try to touch her. "It's like a smudge or something" he continued.

This made Laura unwrap her arms from her boobs, exposing them to Carson's view.

"Where?" she asked again, still not seeing any dirt on her.

"It's like dirt, or something" Carson continued, "Just go like this" he said, rubbing his hand across his own nipple.

Laura had by now been duped into believing him. She took her hand and started rubbing her boob right below the nipple. Carson was enjoying the show.

"Is it off?" Laura asked him.

Not wanting the show to end, Carson lied and said, "No, just keeping rubbing it."

Laura started to rub her boob again, this time all over, trying to get the dirt off.

CUT SCENE: The song again...

_I did it with her_

_On his birthday_

_Johnny doesn't know_

_Johnny doesn't know_

_Johnny doesn't know_

_Johnny doesn't know_

_So don't tell Johnny_

_Cause Johnny doesn't know_

CUT SCENE: Carson and Laura in the spa...

"No, it's just not coming off" he told her.

"What is it?" she asked again.

"Maybe it's tree sap or something. Try pinching it" and with this suggestion, Laura proceeded to pinch her boob.

By now, Carson had grown hard. He was enjoying himself, but wanted to touch Laura. "It's still not coming off. Here let me try" he said.

As Carson leaned in towards Laura, and was about to touch her boob, Laura's friends came back with drinks.

"Oh my God, Laura, what are you doing?" one of them asked, looking disgusted with the scene before her.

"This isn't where I parked my car" Carson tried once again.

Laura's friends had had enough. They called over some of the football players that weren't passed out yet to help them.

The football players took the spa cleaning net, slammed Carson's head through the net, and then threw him over the hedge.

When Carson got up, he walked over to John, and in hopes of making himself feel better, decided to make fun of John.

"Great song. This band rocks," he said.

John just nodded, got himself another drink, and chugged it. He had had enough of the party. John and Carson walked over to the car, and John drove them home. Luckily, he didn't hit anything on the way, even being as drunk as he was.

To be continued...

A/N: Sorry, this is going to be a three part beginning explanation of why they all end up going to Europe. I will post the next part as soon as I can.

Again, sorry to keep you waiting.


	3. The Aftermath

A/N: I decided to split the prologue even further. Sorry for the wait. I had to try and figure out a way for John to mess up Weir's name.

After the Party

John was completely drunk. He had no clue what he was doing. When he went to the bathroom, instead of peeing in the toilet, he peed on the floor. On top of that, on his way out, he still flushed the toilet.

He walked over to his computer and checked his mail. Weir sent him another mail. John opened it and started to read.

"Dear John, I was very sorry to hear about your lady woman Teyla dumping you. Since you no longer have a girlfriend, maybe I can come to America and we can get to know each other. Perhaps we could 'zussamen," the mail said.

"Zussamen? What the fuck is a zussamen?" John asked himself.

He reached into his desk and pulled out his German dictionary. Finding zussamen, he read the definition: _to arrange a meeting_. John freaked out. He moved away from his computer and started talking to himself.

"No, no, no, no. Carson was right. This guy wants to have sex with me," John was seriously freaked out now. He never thought this would happen to him.

John sat back down and started quickly typing his response, without thinking about what he was doing.

_Dear Weir, I don't want to arrange any meetings with you, you sick German freak. So please keep your hands off my genitals, never write me again, and never come to America_

He hit send and turned off the monitor. Then he went and fell asleep on his bed without changing out of his clothes. He woke up to find drool all over his face. He also had a massive headache.

"I'm never drinking again," John said to himself.

He sat up and saw his brother sitting at his computer.

"What are you doing?" he asked.

"Reading you email," came the response.

"Don't do that. Why are you wearing my bathrobe?" John had noticed that his brother had been sitting there in his black bathrobe.

"Oh, I'm sorry, but someone pissed all over mine last night," he said, looking at John, "Wow, I can't believe this German chick wants to come here and hook up with you."

Now, John was confused. "Weir's a guy," he told his brother.

His brother laughed at him.

"No, it says right here 'trauriges madchen,' I was a sad girl to hear about Teyla," his brother pointed out to him.

John looked at the screen, still not believing his brother. He went to his dresser, and pulled something out.

"Come here," he told his brother. "See? That's a picture of Weir, and that's his cute cousin Lindsey," John said when his brother came over, pointing to the man and woman, respectively on the picture while saying the names.

"No, that's Weir," his brother said pointing to the woman, "They introduce themselves by their last names first. Her name is Elizabeth Weir, not Weir Elizabeth like you thought, and that's Jan Lindsey, not Lindsey Jan, retard."

His brother walked out of John's room laughing when he saw that John had made a mistake. John ran over to his computer, hoping to send another email, explaining himself to Elizabeth. When he tried to send it, he got a message back saying that he had been blocked.

As he was freaking out, Carson walked into the room. He saw John pacing and knew something was wrong.

"Hey, what's going on?" he asked.

"I'm in love with my pen pal," John started, "I'm in love with Weir."

Carson, not knowing that Weir was actually Elizabeth and a girl, took that to mean that John was gay and in love with a guy. He went over to John and patted him on his back.

"You know what? I was expecting this," he started, "Frankly, I'm flattered you picked me to come out to first, and don't worry about telling your folks..." he was cut off by John.

"No, you idiot, Weir is a girl. Her full name is Elizabeth Weir. Come here," John pulled the picture out again.

"Wow, who's the hot chick?" Carson said, eyeing the woman on the photograph.

"That's Weir," John said, "I mean Elizabeth."

Carson was seriously shocked. He would never have imagined something like that to happen.

"That's who you've been writing all this time?" Carson asked, completely surprised.

"Yea, until last night, when I took your advice," John started yelling at Carson, "And told her to keep her 'hands off my genitals' and to leave me alone."

He continued to pace around the room, trying to figure out what to do to fix his problem. Carson watched his friend, also trying to come up with a solution.

"Given what we know now, that seems like the exact opposite of what you want," Carson said, trying to lighten the mood with a joke.

"God, this is a total disaster," John said, sitting down on his bed and put his face in his hands.

"Oh come on, it's not that bad," Carson sat down on the bed next to John, "though she is really hot."

"You're not listening," John told Carson, "I don't even care what she looks like, Elizabeth and I had this incredible bond. I told her things I couldn't even tell you," he finished.

Carson was saddened to hear that his friend felt that he couldn't tell him everything.

"Like what?" he asked John.

"Huh? Oh, nothing. It's a figure of speech," John said.

"You like me better right?" Carson asked wanting to make sure he hadn't lost his friend.

John stood up. He turned to face Carson, who was still sitting on the bed, and started talking again.

"This girl is not only smart and funny, and stunningly beautiful," he started, "But until I screwed up, she wanted to come to all the way to America, just to be with me."

"So then do something about it," Carson said.

John looked at his friend and said, "What can I do? She blocked her email account. The only thing I know is that she lives in Berlin."

Carson stood up and looked at John.

"So then go to Berlin," he said, looking at his friend like he couldn't believe John hadn't come up with that as a solution.

"I can't just go to Berlin, Carson," John said, exasperated.

"Why not?" Carson asked, wanting to know John's reasons.

"I just can't. I'm supposed to stay here and get training this summer. It will help me later on when I go and become a pilot for the air force," John replied.

"Oh, Jesus, John. Teyla was right," Carson started, "You are so predictable."

John stood there for a while, contemplating what Carson had said. He realized that Carson was right. He really was too predictable and he needed to do something to change it. He made up his mind.

"That's it. I'm going to Germany," he told Carson.

Carson beamed and walked closer to John.

"No," he started, "We're going to Germany."

"How are we going to get to Germany?" John asked him.

"Don't worry about it. I have it covered," Carson assured John.

The two of them spent the rest of the day packing their stuff, trying to get it to fit into two backpacks. Carson had told John that they wouldn't be there that long and could always just buy whatever they needed.

In the morning, they headed to the airport. They called a cab, not wanting to pay the high long term parking fees. On their way to the airport, they talked about how they were going to go about finding Elizabeth. When they finally got there, John discovered Carson's plan of getting them to Germany.

"We're going to be couriers?" John asked Carson, looking at him quizzically.

"Best way to fly cheap," Carson said to him, "We just have to carry their packages, and then drop them off when we get there."

Just then, the lady at the counter came back. She had been in the back, checking to see if they had any packages for Germany.

"I'm sorry. I don't have anything to Germany for a week," she told them, "but I can get you to London today for $83.78."

John was disappointed.

"Do you have anything else?" he asked her, hoping to get closer to Germany.

Carson pulled him aside to talk to him.

"Europe is the size of Eastwood mall. We can walk to Berlin from there," he said.

"Carson, England is an island," John told his friend.

"Fine, we'll swim. Whatever," he turned back to the lady and said, "We'll take it."

John gave her the money and the lady handed them their tickets and the packages that they had to take with them. They went to the gate, handed them their tickets, and went and sat down. Once they were sitting, John turned to Carson.

John tapped his friends arm, "Hey, thanks again for coming with me, I know you had that internship at the hospital this summer," he told Carson.

"Well, forget the hospital," Carson started, "And don't thank me. I should be thanking you. This trip is an once-in-a-lifetime opportunity for me to broaden my sexual horizons," he stated.

John looked at his friend in wonder, "What are you talking about?"

Carson looked back at him, "I'm talking about crazy European sex."

_Oh ok, that explains it_, John thought. "Ah okay."

Now it was Carson's turn to explain to John what he meant.

"You do know America was founded by prudes," he started, looking at John, "Prudes who left Europe because they hated all the kinky, steamy sex that was going on."

When John didn't answer, Carson continued.

"And now, I, Carson Beckett, will return to the land of my perverted forefathers and claim my birth right," he sat back in the seat, "which is a series of erotic and sexually challenging adventure."

John looked at Carson in amusement, "You've really thought a lot about this, haven't you?"

Carson looked at him with determination in his eyes, "It's my passion."

John shook his head at his friend's statement and leaned back in the chair. He hadn't really expected anything less from him, but it was still amusing to hear Carson talk about sex like that.

They spent the plane trip taking some more about how they would get from England to Berlin, watching movies, and sleeping. Carson had still been intent on finding some girl when they landed and having sex with her. John just wanted to get to Elizabeth and tell her he loved her.

To be continued...

A/N: Well that's the end of the prologue explaining why they are going to Europe. From here on out, all the new chapters will be the different countries they visit, starting with London. They will be longer and, therefore, might take longer to be posted.


	4. England

A/N: Sorry for the long wait. Holidays and then school started up again. Anyway, here's the next chapter of the story.

Jolly Old England

The plane landed and John and Carson went to collect their baggage. They took the boxes that they had to carry and brought them over to the deposit place. Once the packages were disposed of, they left the airport, wanting to start their adventure.

They walked out of the airport and started walking down the street. John stopped and looked around.

"Welcome to jolly old England," John said.

"Yeah, breathe that sweet, sexy, European air," Carson replied.

All of a sudden, a ringing went off, resembling the song that Ronon had sung during the party.

"What's that?" John asked Carson.

"It's the phone they gave me at the hospital," Carson answered.

"That's cool," John replied.

"Yeah, and it works anywhere," Carson said, "Excuse me."

Carson turned around so that he could answer the phone. John just stared at him, an amused look on his face.

"Carson here. Hello, Mr. Walters," Carson started, "Yes, sir. I'm down in file storage. Umm, hold on a second."

Carson looked around for a while before putting the phone back to his ear.

"No, sir. I can't find the files anywhere," Carson said, "Yes, sir, I'll keep looking. I don't rest until I find it."

John was in tears, laughing at the way Carson had just lied to his boss.

"Didn't tell your boss you were leaving the country?" John managed to ask him.

"They would have stopped paying me," Carson replied, "It seemed easier."

"So, where to?" John asked him.

"I don't know," Carson answered.

John looked at his watch.

"The first bus to Berlin doesn't leave till tomorrow. What do you want to do?" John started, "Got the Tower of London; there's Buckingham Palace..."

John noticed that Carson didn't really like either of those two ideas. John sighed, knowing exactly what Carson was thinking about.

"There's no drinking age," John said.

Carson's face lit up, "There you go! Come on, let's go."

John and Carson started walking down the street, looking for the first pub they could find. They walked for a while and then they finally found one.

"Hey look, 'The Feisty Goat'" Carson said.

"All right. Let's go," John responded.

They opened the door and walked in. Inside the bar, people were drinking and partying already. The two of them walked up to the bar and waited for the bartender to come. They were just about to order when the people in the bar came up behind them and started picking a fight.

"Hey, this isn't where I parked my car," Carson tried to get out of it.

"Oy," came a noise out of the group, "Who the bloody hell are you?"

John and Carson turned around to face the voice. Out from the crowd a large, mean looking man came through the crowd.

"This is a private members bar, exclusively for the supporters of the greatest football team in the world," he continued, "Manchester United! Now please, enlighten me. Who the fuck are you?"

"That is a good question, and... Johnny?" Carson started.

"We're the Manchester United fan club..." John started, thinking on his feet, "from Ohio."

The man didn't completely believe him.

"If you're Manchester United supporters," he said, "then sing the Manchester United song."

"Excuse me," Carson chimed in, "I'm not much of a singer."

"Sing!" the man yelled at them.

John jumped back a little and started singing. He started singing the first song that came into his head.

_My baby takes the morning train,_

_He works from nine to ten and then_

_He takes another home again_

_To find me ... watching the Manchester United football team_

John finished. He looked around and was trying to think of a way out of the mess when all of a sudden...

"Pretty good," the man said, "Pretty damn good, lads!"

Both John and Carson were surprised by his reaction, but were even more surprised when he came over and hugged them both. They were led over to the bar and handed drinks.

They spent the night partying with Ford (he told them his name after handing them their drinks) and the boys, drinking way more than they should. They even participated in games such as breaking bottles over Ford's head and opening the bottles with their eyes.

Both of them passed out and were taken by the boys and put in a bus. The boys started driving the bus, going to the next game that the Manchester United team was playing in.

TBC

A/N: Football is soccer in England, for those of you that were confused. The next chapter starts with John and Carson on the bus, headed to their next stop: France.


End file.
